hazard 27 (defunct) › floor › view

write enable write protect (24/06/2005)

So it's really weird. I think. Not really sure, but that's because I lost confidence. Probably since I did something on my own accord and failed after so many years of success by doing what other people tell me to do. It's like the weights at the bottom of curtains. If they get greedy when it's windy they get crushed by windows. It's even funnier when the window shatters.

But that's not the point. My dreams are failing me. Day dreams are still okay, but when I sleep. It's confusing. Usually in order to sleep, or before I sleep, I remember anything that's already happened. And I drift from remembering to reliving and dreaming of the past. Keeps my memory in check. Been doing that since I was four and was made fun of because I couldn't even remember what happened a week ago. Helps me compare to the present. Very easily. But now, I dream of what could have been. Dreaming always start off the same, but then it skips an important moment of my life, as if it didn't happen.

Then I'm always happy, until I wake up. Then I have to remember what really happened. I haven't been happy for years. And it's getting harder to hide.

Options: [put it on the wall] [help] [exit]

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